陈凯博客： www.kaichenblog.blogspot.com

我生来就不是“中国人”
I Have Never Been a "Chinese"

与中共党朝与专制文化心态的博争 – 价值之争而绝非权力之争
Establishing Values vs. Power Struggle

“自由人”对抗“中国人”序列
"Free Beings" vs. "Chinese" Series

陈凯 Kai Chen （Written 1/6/2011, Reprint 4/30/2011)
www.kaichenblog.blogspot.com

一个人的真实个体认同是他是否能自由与幸福的基点。 一个人是否首先是个“自由人”决定了他是否有真实的信仰与理念。 这世界上没有人可以自由于上苍与人性。 但一个人必须首先是个有自由意志与选择的人才能真正认知上苍，才能真正与自身的人性（个性实质）对话沟通。

在不久前我与一位朋友的对话中，他很漫不经心地断言“你我都是‘中国人’”。 我马上纠正他说：“我是一个‘美国人’。 我生来就从不是一个‘中国人’而是一个‘自由人’。” 他沉默不语，不知如何作答。 我马上意识到他从未认真思考过他的个体认同。 他的个体认同是虚无的，被群体专制文化心态定位的，被中文文字习惯控制的与被“走捷径”情结奴役的。 我由此更深刻地感到了一个人的真实“个体认同”的关键与必要。 没有基于良知与理性的真实个体认同，一个人的行为将永远是无方向、无价值的“驴拉磨”与“被鞭笞而转的陀螺”。 东亚大陆的围绕“权争”的永久“朝代循环”只不过是每个华语系人的个体认同的虚无与反价值的投射而已（就如中共党朝与专制社会的结构不过是每个华语系人的家庭专制等级伦礼结构的投射而已）。

我曾经说过“我虽然生下来是个中国人，我选择了作一个美国人”(Although I was born Chinese, I chose to be American”)。 但经过一段思考之后，我觉得这样的说法更确切：“我生来就不是个‘中国人’。 我生来就是个‘自由人’并也是个‘美国人’。 我只是生错了地方。 ”( I was never born ‘Chinese’. I was born a ‘free being’; therefore I was born an “American”. I was born only in the wrong place.)

大多的华语系人们从不询问与关心自身的“个体认同”。 他们似乎从来都把“中国人”不加思考地视为他们的第一认同。 似乎“不是中国人”对华语系的人们永远都是一种最大的侮辱与亵渎。 在没有任何人询问或懂得什么是“中国”二字所代表的意义时，所有的人都将“中国”作为神去顶礼膜拜。 爱“中国”的永远是好的和有价值的；反“中国”的永远是邪恶的和应被诅咒的。 但当你用良知与理性去鉴别与分析这些华语系人们的个体认同时，你就会发现： 他们的这个“中国”其实是“反神（假冒神）、反人性、反价值”的，用零去乘（去消灭）任何存在与价值的纯粹“虚无”。 被阉割精髓实质的“宦官”，“跪着生”的奴才，“站着死”的烈士与貌似神的杀人虐人的专制魔王们充斥着华语系人们的精神与物质的世界。 “中国”（中庸与中央的永世王朝）说到底是对人类普世终极价值（真实、正义、自由与尊严，Truth, Justice, Liberty, Dignity）的彻底反动。 将自己认同为“中国人”说到底是对人性、良知、理性的彻底反动。 将“中国”当成“圣牛”等同神是对上苍与道德的彻底反动。

当那些海外的“反共”人士们拼命地与中共党朝（China’s Party-Dynasty）争夺谁更代表“中国”而从不知、不定义“中国”二字的内涵实质的时候，他们实际是在与中共党朝争夺谁比谁更虚无、谁比谁更有强权、谁比谁的人数更多、谁比谁更“中国化”。 不难看出，那些对刘晓波的无端指责、栽赃与谩骂的人们大都来自这些“纯粹的中国人”。 他们无视刘晓波所代表的反专制暴政、反暴力仇恨、反中国“宦奴娼”文化的精髓实质，将他标签戴帽地说成是一匹“走极端”的“黑马”并将他边缘化。 我在“刘晓波的伟大在于他是个‘人’”等文章中一再指出： 刘晓波的获奖给所有华语系的人们带来一个自省的机会与转折点 – 脱离“中国”的反人、反价值、反存在的虚无文化认同，走向人性、自由、存在、尊严与追求真实幸福的普世终极的“人”的价值。

我说我生下来就是个“美国人”是在说我生下来就是个“自由人”。 我从来在中共党朝与专制文化的土地上就没有任何的“归属认同感”。 我 – 一个心灵上的自由人，从来都是被所有的认同“中国”的道德虚无的伦礼奴才们所歧视、侮辱与折磨的。 我说我将永远首先是个“美国人”是在说我将永远认同“美国”所代表的“存在”的价值 – 生命、自由与对幸福的不懈追求。 我首先是个被上苍（神）所创造的“自由人”，其次我是个父亲、丈夫、男人、儿子、作家、运动家、反共活动家、商人、、、等等。 “我是个黄皮肤的亚裔人”、“我生在北京”、“我讲华语”可能会被排在我的个体认同的一百位以后。

说我生在东亚大陆我就非得是个“中国人”只表明了那些“环境奴”与“种族地域奴”的人的低下心态。 说我因为母语是华语我就非得是个“中国人”只表明了那些“语言奴”的无奈绝望（难道说英语的人们都得是英国人？）。 说我的黄皮肤与亚裔外表就标明我的“中国”认同只表明了那些“种族奴”的病态狂热。

我只在此忠告那些将“中国人”作为他们个体的第一认同的人们： 不要误以为我是和你们一样追求“宏大的虚无”而逃避自由与幸福的“中国人”。 不要将一个连你自己也无法定义的虚幻词汇“中国”作为“圣牛”与价值（神）去崇拜。 不要将基于杀人暴力的“统一”，将灭人良知理性的“腐儒文化”， 将遍设“文字狱”、“思想狱”的谎言世界的“和谐”，将“繁荣昌盛”的“奴才王朝”作为价值、个体认同与“中国”的定义去褒扬追求。

在我的世界里，“人”永远是自由的、有尊严的、有道德正义感的存在的实体，而绝不是一个夹在、躲在群体中的数字；“人”永远是追求“站着生”的意义存在，而绝不是物化的“跪着生”的奴才和神化的“站着死”的烈士。 只有当人们真正懂得生命与存在、真正建立道德的个体认同的时候，“中国”二字（也可能是“东亚联邦共和体”--- 一个新的名称概念去取代“中国”）才可能开始真正有意义。

陈凯博客： www.kaichenblog.blogspot.com

陈凯一语：Kai Chen's Words:

这位读者的观点反映了许多将“中共党奴朝”与“中国人”文化心态分离的人的思维谬误。 “政治上正确”被许多人用来否认真实，回避自身的怯懦。 说毛泽东身上没有秦始皇是对真实的污诋。 说“中国文化”可以用来解决中国的问题是“揪发助飞”的迷梦。 说“中国人”对当今的“中国道德黑洞”的状态没有个体责任而只有“中共”负责是长期吸食文化毒品的奴化心态的产物。 只有唤起每一个人的良知并诉诸每一个人的道德勇气，华语系的人们在能开始走上自由之路。

I am very glad to have a chance to clarify my points through this exchange with this sincere and thoughtful reader. He reflects the majority "anti-communist" people's view. Yet, "political correctness" often plays a big role in such a view. One must face the truth to solve the true problem. Avoiding the truth simply because the problem is too big will never help. My responsibility is to help people like these, with their good intentions, see the magnitude of the problem and to prepare themselves for the coming challenges. We must have will, courage and ability to see the truth to progress toward a better future.

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"Ordinary Chinese" - Mao's Willing Executioners
普通“中国人”- 毛泽东的行刑者

"Free Beings" vs. "Chinese" Series
”自由人“对抗“中国人”序列

A Meaningful Exchange with a Reader
与我的读者的一次有意义的对话

(Thanks Wallace for a thoughtful message.)

By Kai Chen 陈凯 （Reprint 5/22/2011)

The mistake commonly committed by people is that the fruit a tree bears has nothing to do with the tree, or with the soil, or with the climate. The truth is the fruit, in China's case, a most poisonous fruit, is the result of all the factors, not just the fruit itself, or the tree itself, but of the content of the soil and the climate.

No one wants to address the truth, because of "political correctness", or fear of its consequences. But without addressing the truth, the world will never progress. "Only truth shall set you free." There is a book on WWII Holocaust "Hitler's Willing Executioners", documenting how common Germans using Hitler's policy to benefit themselves, killing thousands of Jews in the process. By the same token, Mao himself will be never able to murder 80 million innocent lives during peace time in China. Then who killed? Now all the killers are hiding under the big umbrella of "victims" of Mao. But the truth is: The victims are often victimizers themselves, just as the willing slaves are often harboring evil intentions to become masters (not of themselves, but of others).

What I am addressing with my messages is the truth. As the Nobel Peace Prize winner Mr. Liu Xiaobo (who is still languishing in a Chinese prison) once pointed out: "The tragedies in Chinese history are made both by the victimizers and the victims. Everyone is a producer, a director and an actor in the two thousand years of Chinese tragedy." Most people don't want to face this truth, therefore don't want to face their own responsibilities in producing this tragedy. And you, Mr. Schwam, is not helping by sending a wrong message throughout your contact with the Chinese and others. You are, with your wrong messages, helping the Chinese themselves to omit/deny their own individual responsibilities, so they can go back to their nationalistic fervor against the universal values of freedom and dignity. They will continue to sing in praise of dung beetles in a culture of excrement, rejecting God's law of freedom, justice and truth.

A fish reared in a chamber pot is a sick and poisonous fish. Such a fish may not survive in the fresh water and ocean. It has long mutated into a warped state of being. To prepare the fish to live in a natural environment requires a painstaking effort. It requires will, courage and ability. I hope you pluck up your courage and moral clarity to see the truth, and help the Chinese and the oppressed in the world to wake up and bear their personal responsibilities.

I thank you for your meaningful message and hope to be in touch with you.

Best. Kai Chen

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Message Attachment 附读者原文：

In a message dated 1/17/2011 6:17:54 A.M. Pacific Standard Time, 1c writes:

Greetings Kai Chen,

Sometimes, when I'm reading electricshadow, I feel that there is not enough distinction made between "China", the "Chinese Gov." and the "Chinese People".

As an American, I wish the Chinese People well. I look forward to the day when they will live under a representative government that cherishes freedom. Likewise, my attitude toward "China" is not necessarily hostile. I want China to be a great nation not a hegamoniacal menace. I want to see China so free and non threatening that Taiwan will want closer relations of its own accord. Nevertheless, we have to deal with the present Chinese government; A one party system, totalitarian in its mindset, trampling on dissent, striving to become a global censor. It's this government that we must oppose if the world it to avoid an Orwellian nightmare.

For the above reasons, we must find a way to criticize the Chinese Gov., while holding out hope to the Chinese people, in all of our communications.

With Best Wishes, Wallace Schwam